SNL Transcripts: Howard Hesseman: 12/08/79


 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 5: Episode 6

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Air Date:


Musical Guest:

Special Guests:


December 8th, 1979

Howard Hesseman

Randy Newman


Tom Davis

Al Franken

Peter Aykroyd
Great Moments in Rock & RollSummary: Early in his career, James Brown (Garrett Morris) is forced to abandon his Scottish musical roots.

Recurring Characters: Don Kirshner, James Brown.


Howard Hesseman’s MonologueSummary: Howard Hesseman whips the audience into a pro-restraint chant.

The Bel AirabsSummary: Profiteers (Howard Hesseman, Garrett Morris) attempt to swindle the newfound fortune of Abdul Asad (Don Novello) and his clan.

Recurring Characters: Mudhad Asad, Fatima Asad, Abdul Asad, Granny, Miss Hathaway.

Randy Newman performs “It’s Money That I Love” & “I’m Gonna Take Off My Pants”

Weekend Update with Jane Curtin & Bill MurraySummary: Chico Escuela (Garrett Morris) gives a sports update and tries to avoid mentioning Anita Dark. Al Franken announces that the 1980’s will henceforth be known as The Al Franken Decade.

Recurring Characters: Chico Escuela.


BoyfriendsSummary: Susan’s (Gilda Radner) feelings for boyfriend Jerome (Howard Hesseman) are complicated by a visit from ex-lover Scott (Bill Murray).


Stereo 105Summary: Obnoxious morning jock Steve Marvin (Harry Shearer) interviews former radio man Howard Hesseman.


The Nuclear FamilySummary: Family unit (Howard Hesseman, Jane Curtin, Peter Aykroyd, Laraine Newman) are oblivious to the negative aspects of living between a pair of nuclear reactors.


Randy Newman performs “The Story of a Rock & Roll Band”

“First Love”Summary: In a film by Aviva Slesin, Jane Curtin tries desperately to catch up with her first love, Walter Cronkite.

The Holiday Inn Horror Summary: A couple’s (Bill Murray, Jane Curtin) relaxing hotel stay is interrupted by maid Rosa Santangelo’s (Gilda Radner) 6:30 a.m. vacuuming duties.

Recurring Characters: Rosa Santangelo.


SNL Transcripts

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Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King is directing his fourteenth season of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him nine Emmys and thirteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for thirteen DGA Awards and won in 2014, 2016, 2017, 2018 and 2019. Mr. King is also the creative director of Broadway Worldwide which brings theatrical events to theaters. The company has produced Smokey Joe’s Café; Putting It Together with Carol Burnett; Jekyll & Hyde; and Memphis, all directed by Mr. King. He completed the screen capture of Broadway's Romeo & Juliet in 2013. - LinkedIn

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