SNL Transcripts: Dick Cavett: 01/31/76: H & L Brock I


 Saturday Night Live Transcripts

  Season 1: Episode 12

75l: Dick Cavett / Jimmy Cliff

H & L Brock I

Lowell Brock … John Belushi

[open on Lowell Brock standing behind his chair in his office, reading a folder]

Lowell Brock: Hi, I’m Lowell Brock, for H&L Brock, with more of my seventeen reasons why you should bring your taxes to us, insa- instead of H&R Block. [he sits in the chair]

Reason number one: [SUPER: “REASON #1: WE CHEAT FOR YOU”] we are willing to cheat for you. Take for example, this little item [indicates folder]- reason number two: [SUPER: “REASON #2: BOGUS RECEIPT SERVICE”] our bogus receipt service. [Spreads folder to show various fake receipts]. We can fabricate entire business trips using our collection of all the standard receipt forms used by [points to various receipts] legitimate restaurants, airlines, car rentals, or any expense remotely related to your business. [closes folder]

Why pay costly taxes [removes his glasses] when you don’t have to? [SUPER: “H&L BROCK: THE TAX FRAUD PEOPLE”] Bring your taxes to H&L Brock and don’t you be a chump this year.

[applause and fade]

Submitted Anonymously

SNL Transcripts

How useful was this post?

Click on a star to rate it!

Average rating 0 / 5. Vote count: 0

No votes so far! Be the first to rate this post.

Author: Don Roy King

Don Roy King is directing his fourteenth season of Saturday Night Live. That work has earned him nine Emmys and thirteen nominations. Additionally, he has been nominated for thirteen DGA Awards and won in 2014, 2016, 2017, 2018 and 2019. Mr. King is also the creative director of Broadway Worldwide which brings theatrical events to theaters. The company has produced Smokey Joe’s Café; Putting It Together with Carol Burnett; Jekyll & Hyde; and Memphis, all directed by Mr. King. He completed the screen capture of Broadway's Romeo & Juliet in 2013. - LinkedIn

Notify of
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments